my-speck

i'm pregnant and it's going to be a rollercoaster

Too much to even try to catch-up. July 18, 2010

Hello Poogie,

once again, weeks have gone by and I haven’t had the time to write. This happens once in a while – a few days go by, then I think, “Aha, I should write about …….”. Then a few more days go by, I forget what it was then I start to get overwhelmed with how much I have to write. So I don’t… and then the cycle continues.

In this case I’ve also been rather extremely busy: we’ve been getting used to Childcare (you and I), I’ve been working and my work project went somewhat sideways so required some brainpower and attention, uni is getting busy – just wrote my first exam on Saturday and we’ve started work on the assignment…. And you just are SO much fun to hang out with, that when you’re awake and I’m not working I just want to play with you. So housework and writing blogs has been slightly sidelined in preference to actual living.

(Oh, and I’ve developed a slight addiction to (more…)

 

Exploring the wild… June 17, 2010

So, one of the things you’re really getting into at the moment is exploring the wild places in life. Like our back garden.

exploring the garden

exploring the garden

Which is all great fun. You’ve mostly stopped putting absolutely everything into your mouth all the time (now it is just most things about 20% of the time), so I feel more (more…)

 

WALKING!!! – Movie June 2, 2010

poogie learning to walk

walking!!

Well, all I can say is that our little family has been flat-out!

So have had not a minute to write anything on the blog, take photos, do videos. Anything.

But. Last night’s video that your dad took of your and your Aunt R1 warrants a post.

Because he finally got you on camera – WALKING!

(more…)

 

It’s nearly mother’s day… But where is the Mother? May 8, 2010

It’s a question I ask myself quite a bit.

Who am I and where do I fit into this equation of our family and day-to-day life?

Being a mum for the past almost-year has been an all-subsuming, totally rewarding, utterly exhausting and overall transformative process. Positive. But inarguably challenging on many levels.

As an aside about being all-consuming and mind-bending:  I’m re-reading the title of this post and thinking that I’ve subconsciously started to style my language along the lines of a children’s book – we read so many each day, and my waking minutes are so focussed on looking after you.   (The book it’s based on has slipped out of my mind, but the language persists. It’ll come to me, just give it about 36 hours. Dead of the night. I’ll sit bolt upright in bed and remember.)

Coping?

Some days I think I’m coping really well, and all is gleeful (Wednesday).   (more…)

 

Ten years ago today… March 10, 2010

Filed under: emotion,family — rakster @ 5:45 pm
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Ten years ago today I was young, carefree and needed to go dancing.  Did you know I liked to dance?

Picture a dimly lit nightclub with lots of strobe lights, loud pumping house music and lots of people.  A UK DJ playing a banging set. Me, in there somewhere with S, out for a dance.  Dancing ensued. Lots of dancing, laughing, talking, dancing.

2am rolled around and (more…)

 

Laugh your ass off Mark II (activities for children) – Movie Monday March 8, 2010

Hi Poogie,

You’ve taken the Laugh Your Ass Off Game to a whole new level.  You are regaling us with fits of laughter daily.  I managed to get this one on camera – it was just after you woke up from a nap.

This week it was laughing your ass off with dad…

(more…)

 

Bad parent of the day award. And the winner is… February 19, 2010

We have an award in our house: it’s the “Bad Parent of the Day”.

It started as a joke. Your dad had a quiet chat with me a few days after we came home from the hospital and he went to work which went along the lines that as I’m at home with ‘the baby’ all day every day then I’m the one who is most likely to be the responsible parent when ‘the baby’ does get injured. Accidental maybe, but we both knew it was going to be heartwrenching, and that was your dad’s way of telling me that he wasn’t going to be angry or upset or judgemental, just supportive. Because the odds were against me.

To be honest, I don’t even remember now what your first big mishap was. I should have blogged about it, because I know it was very real and scarey at the time, but now it has just melded into a conglomerate memory of the past few months, where some days you injure yourself, or I injure you (unintentionally and generally pretty minor so far, cross fingers) and some days nothing happens but you’re still grumpy and scream at times and I’m still lacking sleep so really ask me the next day what happened the day before and I’d be hard pressed. (Oh, and I still don’t come up for air when talking. Some things don’t change.)

So as the days meld into one another, we commemorate each mishap of bad parenting with our “Bad Parent of the Day” Award. I guess I do probably win it more than your dad, but considering I’m on more parenting duty, I think the balance on weighted means would be in his favour. Or disfavour depending on how you view it.

Today’s winner? Well, I can’t think of it. Maybe it hasn’t happened yet. Or, if you count letting your baby eat of the floor as a bad thing I probably shouldn’t have fed you the cucumber you dropped on the footpath in the Valley this morning, then Me. The footpaths there are not your average cleanliness, somewhat below… In the scheme of things, minor.

Three days ago? Me. You know about the whole carrot intolerancething? Well, I went to cook more food for you and found the freezer cubes we use to freeze your food in full: of chicken stew. So I dutifully emptied them all into the sink and then flushed them down the loo. Thinking all the while, “Gee, what a waste. It’s not the food that bothers me so much as the love and time your dad put into cooking it”. And it’s not like I’m ever going to cook you chicken stew (pescetarian avoiding meat cooking at all costs). So it was a bit special.

Dumb di dumb di dumb. Well, it turned out your Dad had already lovingly thrown out all the offensive carrot-containing stew, and cooked you a whole new batch. Which was exactly what I threw out. Mmm. Bad parent of the day award: Mum.

Love you boopie baby
mum

 

Activities for children: The Laugh Your Ass Off (LYAO) Game February 4, 2010

Hello!

Yep, that is me using another one of those finnicky acronyms that usually piss me off. But my mood is up and it can’t be diquieted with simple annoyances for the enjoyable things in life win-out.

Today’s pleasure: the LYAO (Laugh your ass off) game.

Again, a developmental milestone that is talked about in the baby books and literature is babies learning to laugh. You’ve definitely nailed it.

There was no way before I had you that I could have imagined the immense pleasure and pure hilarity of just sitting there on the floor with you on the bed, playing our Laugh Your Ass Off Game.

The funniest thing is, I end up in huge fits of belly-shaking convulsive for-real laughter too. Good for the soul.

 

I love you punchy.

mum

 

Birth Story: “A Generation Ago” February 3, 2010

Hello Poogie ,

So.  The first Birth Story in the series is today’s reading.

This story is by your maternal Great Grandmother about your Grandma K joining the world.  So I guess now it is two generations ago, rather than one.   It’s very special to me and I’m really glad that my Grandma got to share it with us – it’s a sneak peek into birthing in the 1950’s.   Your Grandma was a very beautiful person, and someone who was always there for me during my childhood.  I’m crying as I write this as I still miss her (she died 17 or so years ago).   I really would have liked if you could have met her – you’ll have to imagine her based on my stories about her and some of the things she did leave me and I can share with you: a love of baking, reading (poetry collections) and going to the movies.

…………………..

Birth Story Details:

where: hospital, Australia

when: 1952

who: birth of your Grandma K

…………………..

A Generation Ago

At 7am on 30 May, 1952, I woke up with an uneasy sensation in the stomach.  My husband suggested that I rest in bed while he prepared breakfast.  As soon as the smell of bacon and eggs floated through the house, I felt nauseated and made a frantic dash to the toilet.  That was when the continuous pain set in – not the intermittent bouts I had been told to expect.  Breakfast forgotten, we took off for the hospital, foot well down on the accelerator all the way.  No relief from the thrusting pain at all.

By 7:40am I was admitted to the hospital where immediate preparations went into top gear. Although I didn’t realise it at the time, I was rushed into the public labour ward as the intermediate ward was filled to capacity.  As I was wheeled into the long room, I was horrified at the complete lack of privacy: only flimsy curtains separated the beds on which women lay in all stages of the birth process.  Some were groaning, some shrieking and a few for whom the ordeal was over smugly assured me how wonderful it was to have the birth all over.

My pain continued unabated while I had to endure that humiliating preparatory shaving and the putting on of those big white leggings that went right up to the top of the thigh.  When my legs were hoisted in the air, I was given that gas-mask to use when the pain became too agonising.  I tried desperately hard to avoid the use of this, but the continuing constant pain beat me a couple of times.  By the time my own doctor came on the scene, I was so exhausted that I felt I couldn’t stand any more of the unremitting pain.  In response to the sister’s urgings such as “You want your baby, don’t you? Try harder, harder!”, I made my last supreme effort and stayed conscious long enough to see my daughter held up in the air – and to hear one nurse exclaim, “What a shrimp!”.  I flaked out without producing the afterbirth; so that had to be removed by force without my active participation.  It was all over by 10:40am – not a bad effort for a thirty-eight-year-old woman producing her first child.

Because of a lack of beds in the wards, I was kept in the labour ward for the next five hours during which I witnessed births of all kinds and developed admiration for the hospital staff and the way they coped with so many different emergencies so competently.

I must admit, however, that I was more than pleased when a bed for me became vacant in one of the intermediate wards.

Footnote: When my husband came to see me in the afternoon, he complained rather bitterly of the bad headache he’d had all the morning!

…………………..

 

Birth Stories – hopefully the start of a series… February 1, 2010

Today I’m getting around to another one of those not-a-new-years-resolution resolution: get there with the birth stories. Well, start the process anyhow.  Did you notice I was digging around in the storeroom the other day looking for a book? It’s all related.  I thought I’d start simply with a letter I wrote to some friends a month or more ago – but if you’re reading and you want to take part, drop me a comment… home birth book

Hello!

As I think most of you know, I started blogging when I was pregnant & have continued on with my ramblings since then. One of the important posts that I haven’t got around to yet is finishing off the birth story post. I’ve almost got it down, I did most of it in the weeks after Poogie was born, but time is slipping away, and I want to get it out there. I’ve requested a dad version too, which is due before christmas sometime (husband read a book with dad’s versions of birth stories before Poogie was born to help with the birth preparation and found it really helpful). And I have an idea…

When I was a kid, my mother shared her experience having my sister R2, with our family, and had a home birth, which I watched. It’s still one of the best and most memorable experiences of my childhood. Perhaps another reason I remember it so clearly (apart from the event itself) was that soon after that my mum helped edit a book on birth stories. I wrote about my sister’s birth and did a picture, which was published, along with many other stories, in the book. My mum’s story of my birth and my sister’s birth, and my grandmother’s story about my mum’s birth was also published in the book. So. I had the idea before Poogie was born that it would be nice to publish not only his birth story, but republish those of others in my family at the same time, so they’re in one spot and celebrate us all. And, thinking about it further, I thought that it would be an idea to publish a few friends’ birth stories too – that is, if they wanted to share them.

So – here is my request to you. If you have a story (or two, or three) that you (or your partner or kids / family) would like to share, I’d love to be able to publish it on the blog. I’d be happy to do so. Just words, photos and words, anonymous, not-anonymous.. Whatever suits you best…

Love me

P.S. The book my mum worked on was about homebirth – but we’re interested in all types of births, babies or experiences 🙂