my-speck

i'm pregnant and it's going to be a rollercoaster

Not Doing – Attachment Parenting. Doing – Neurotic Mother. October 16, 2009

Filed under: baby stuff,baby's feelings,family,healthcare — rakster @ 5:06 pm
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Hello Poogie,

Well, the a week has passed since I’ve been made unable to walk. I’m now proficient at hobbling on my crutches to the bathroom in the middle of the night with the lights out and managing to avoid all small-baby-toy obstacles that may have been placed in my way without falling over (touch wood. tonight will be the night I go flying now, won’t it?). And I’ve changed. Well, perhaps not changed, just a few personality traits have become more prominent…

I’M A GODDAM CRAZY-ASS CONTROL-FREAK INSTRUCTION-GIVING NEUROTIC MOTHER.

And, the only one you have, I might add.

….

So cheers to my long-suffering sister, your Aunt Reegs. And to my waking-at-6am and not stopping until 10pm feverishly working, caring and cooking husband. I apologise. Retrospectively for the annoyances I’ve already piled on you and in advance for all the more horrid things I’m bound to do over the next few weeks. Sorry. I’m trying. I really am. But it is hard.

Poogie – I cried last night when you cried. I can’t get up to help you and cuddle you. And you dad was losing his patience a little bit ’cause you just screamed solidly in the ‘I’m dying’ mode for 20 minutes. I unhelpfully suggested that you should go in the sling. I knew I shouldn’t say anything, its just so hard to be there and hear you. I told you dad I wanted you. So he took you outside. I cried while you were gone. It is the mother-guilt thing. And the heartbreaking noise of your cries. And the frustration of being stuck, a prisoner on the couch. Not being able to pick you up.

Your dad quietened you down a lot, then bought you back in to me. He is a lovely man (patience of a saint). And I rocked and bounced you to sleep in my arms on the couch. It was good to watch your beautiful little face. And to know that I could settle you even if I can’t walk.

…

So. Yes. Attachment parenting. I don’t do it anywhere near the letter. I think its good for babies to have some alone time, and some time on the floor. Well, its good for you, you like it. And sometimes you get annoyed at being held, and are happy when we put you on the floor. Maybe its just the change in perspective. Anyway, though I don’t do attachment parenting to the letter, I do think that in general, lots of baby-wearing is good too. So I generally sling you about frequently. When I’m doing the washing. When we go for a walk that isn’t too long. No need for an excuse. Anytime is generally good. You have 4 different slings, three of which get lots of use.

  • Baby Bjorn for long walks. It seems to support you well and is good when you fall asleep. And good for jobs when I need both of my hands or are bending over.
  • Slingalong for short stints.  Its great now you’re bigger to go with when we go in and out of the car, ’cause its so fast to put on and off, and you love sitting in it.  But we still have to hold you with one hand, so not good for long distance walking or hand-busy things like cooking..
    the slingalong baby sling with poogie and dad

    the slingalong baby sling with poogie and dad

    sling loading poogie

    sling loading poogie

  • the sling that is just made out of a bit of material.  From the wear your baby website.  Easy to make, lots of ways to wear & experiment.  And you like it.  good for bouncing you around it.

    wear your baby - forward in the sling

    wear your baby – forward in the sling

Right. So why am I neurotic??

Because I’m having to restrain myself from saying, each time you cry and your dad or your aunt look after you:

“Maybe he wants to go in the sling.
Try the sling.
Have you tried this kind of sling yet?
What sling are you going to use?
Are you just going to carry him?
No, you should really try the sling.
He loves the sling….

“

And I’m failing at least 3 times a day.

See. Neurotic. And that is just one example.

Sorry family. Love you Poogie.

mum

P.s. Note to self.  Relinquish control of parenting techniques to those who are actually caring for the baby.  Relinquish control of parenting theories to thoughts when the baby is screaming and someone else is dealing with it. ..

P.P.S..  You still are breastfeeding, of course, and this is still something only I can do.  And you and I have our time to feed, and for the most part, its still beautiful.  I don’t need to be able to walk to do it. And I can see you still love me.

P.P.P.S.  And you still come and play with me on my belly (I’m lying down on the couch most of the day).  And we move outside to the day bed on the front verandah and look at the trees.  And talk and tickle and place there too.  So I’m not doing too bad with attachment.  Just can’t sling you about like normal.

 

Bored mother. October 12, 2009

Filed under: healthcare,Parenting,Raising a Child — rakster @ 10:08 pm
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Hello Poogie!

You’re bored with me (not being able to pick you up and sling you about in our normal pattern). And I’m just simply bored.

On couch.

Elevated foot.

chilling with mum's broken ankle on the day bed

You learnt to suck your thumb today (as opposed to the previous efforts which was just whatever body part fit in at the time).

Bored mum.

Love you
Mum

poogie's first attempts at thumb sucking. Lets hope it doesn't last.

 

i officially have a cankle. Yes, singular. And you don't like bottles all that much! October 11, 2009

Filed under: baby stuff,baby's feelings,healthcare,Parenting,Raising a Child — rakster @ 12:16 pm
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Hello Poogie,

Well. Today is Sunday. I’ve just given you a big feed and you are grunting away in your cot. We’re hoping you’ll have a sleep, but you seem to be resisting. I can’t come and get you as I’m lying on the day-bed, foot up on a pile of pillows. I have a big fat ankle underneath a leg that is in plaster. The ankle is now offically reconstructed. Despite wishing on Friday that I could go back and undo the decision to have it done, its all ok. I got the ankle operated on last Thursday, and we came home on Friday. Right now I can make it to the bathroom and managed to mostly shower myself this morning, but that is the extent of my mobility. I’ve got crutches which I’m still learning how to use (I’m giving myself gold stars for finally after three days having come up with a way of using them to get up from the toilet – that was tough before). So you’re relying on your dad for all assistance with moving and care. Apart from the feeding. You stilll come visit me for that. And you do come and play with me: sitting on my tum and doing some talking a few times a day.

So. Thursday went pretty well overall. You and your dad came in with me to the hospital at an ungodly hour in the morning, then we waited for hours as I was the last operation on the morning’s surgery list. You had a good feed and were happily sleeping in your pram when I got put into the wheelchair & wheeled off down into the basement of the hospital for the surgery. I was a bit nervous, but feeling ok about it. That was until I was sitting by myself in my wheelchair in the pre-op area when I heard the screams and cries of a small boy. I just lost it at that point and started bawling. Good timing as the anaethetist came to put in my canula at that point. She explained that where I was was connected to the recovery room, so the little boy was just waking up from having his adenoids out. And wanted his mum. It was horrible to listen to. I felt so sorry for the kid.

The surgery itself was fine. I had a spinal anasthesia so that I could breastfeed you straight away, so I was awake for the operation. I had a mild sedative to keep me calm and just chatted with the anaethetist and the anaethestic nurse while the surgeons did my ankle behind a sheet. While I was getting operated on, your dad took you for a walk outside. I had expressed some breastmilk for you and he had just taken you to your grandad’s office and was going to heat it up when the nurse called him to say I was back in my bed on the ward. So you came and found me and immediately had a great big feed and a cuddle.

in the hospital bed with baby

you and me in the hospital right after I got back from surgery

You and your dad then stayed with me for the rest of the day, going home at around 7pm after I’d given you two huge night feeds. It was hard to see you go home with your dad: I’d not spent a night apart from you since you were born. I cried a little bit.

you and your dad going home at night... leaving me at the hospital. the view from my bed.

…

Your dad tells me that you were very well behaved at home. He gave you your nightly bath, then tried to give you another feed with some expressed breastmilk from a bottle. Apparently you looked very confused about the whole thing, especially when you tasted the milk from the bottle. And you weren’t really into it, I think you only managed a few sucks. But you slept right through the night as normal anyways. He got up after five in the morning and heated you some more breastmilk, and when you woke you were still a little confused by it all, but since you were hungry you had about 80ml. Enough to keep you going for a while.

I had a bit of a shocking night in the hospital myself, the lady in the bed beside me fell out of her bed at 10pm and there were nurses going back and forth for the next four hours. Then there were the normal checks every hour. I woke at 5 am with the sun. Ready to go home. I called your dad at 6:30 to check what time you were coming in, to see if I should express to empty my very full boobs. Thankfully, he was already getting ready, and you guys arrived at just after 7. Your Aunt Reeg brought you in while your dad went to park the car. I gave you a big feed and you seemed happy. A few hours later we were able to get out and go home. Yay. Me wobbling on my new crutches.

SO.. All in all, it worked out well. I was really nervous about the whole thing. It was a bit more difficult than expected as the hospital was really not very baby-friendly, and sharing a room with four people wasn’t great with you, but you were really well-behaved and so it was bearable. And most important, you and I are both ok.

you playing on my tum as I lie on the day-bed with my foot elevated. My cast in the background.

Since then you’ve been looked after by your Dad and Aunt R, and have been loving all the attention from family who have dropped by to see us. I think you’re a little grumpy at me for not picking you up or playing with you quite as much as normal (well, maybe confused rather than grumpy). But you’re generally still your smiling little self.

Love you
mum

ps. and you seemed to sense that I was upset in the hospital when I was in a bit of pain post-op, and you were so good about it. And again when we got some bad news on Friday. Big hugs. thank-you.

you love the attention! three aunts in attendance.

 

A-OK apart from a cracked ear.. just skin leakage August 10, 2009

Filed under: healthcare,Parenting,Raising a Child — rakster @ 9:45 pm

Hello Poogie,

its all ok.  We have some cortisone cream and you’re going to live.  THe ear infection is not an ear infection at all but a painful and raw case of dry and probably mum-hormone related skin damage.

Not too much crying.  And the source of your irritability today has been established:  the sticky mess that came out your behind has made you feel a lot better.

erk for mum and dad though.  Your dad was on bum-clean duties, I did nappy scrubbing.  No dry-pailing for a mess like that.

love mum

 

your dad cheated (or alternatively he was a creative problem-solver) and carpal tunnel attacks May 27, 2009

Filed under: healthcare,pregnancy — rakster @ 9:23 am
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Hello Speck!

I got it wrong again – your dad didn’t win the celebrity babies (that was S of course & then K second), he won the “fill-in the nursery rhyme blanks” game.   Which I still find pretty amazing (they were hard).   But I got it out of him – how he did it.  Quite tricky really.   He collaborated.  With the 5 year-old L.   So your dad apparently sang the beginning of the rhyme to L & L just finished off the sentences.   Even the one about 3 men in a tub who apparently came from rotten potatoes (who would have known???).    It makes more sense now.   The baby food one I’m not as surprised about.

And I have worked out why my hands are so sore in the morning and why my arms keep being totally numb when I wake up in the middle of the night.  It seems I may have pregnancy-related carpal tunnel syndrome.   Another pregnancy-ailment that occurs mostly in the third trimester and should hopefully disappear when you’re born.   Something to do with the fluid retention in my hands and wrists and crunching up my hands when I sleep.  I’m going to try to drink heaps more water today and perhaps some camomile tea and see if that helps.  Its pretty painful, but goes away relatively quickly once I wake up and move my arms, wrists and fingers about (though this of course hurts).   Love the body changes with pregnancy.  You never know what is coming next.

Hope you’re well.  There is still lots of vigorous movement going on down in there so I suspect you’re not ready to come out yet.  Still in-training.

love you

mum

 

baby shower, shopping for growsuits, downward pressure and lots of washing May 26, 2009

Filed under: baby stuff,birthing,development stages,dreams,eating,family,healthcare,pregnancy — rakster @ 11:51 am
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Hello Big Speck!

Well, its been an eventful few days – all about you and you and you.

Baby shower number two was on Saturday – your wonderful honourary Aunt T & Aunt S (& uncle L) put on an amazing party for you.   Lots of games and fun and people being silly.  It was a mixed affair – so boys & girls and kids as well.  It was quite funny to look around the hall and see at one point everyone with their heads down, concentrating on writing, writing, writing.  Answers to games, and birthday cards for each of your birthdays up to 21.  Pretty cool.   Your dad was the surprise of the day – he managed to win not only the baby food guessing competition, but also the match-the-celebrity-to-their-children’s-names games.  Go figure.  I came last in that one.   Mmm.  However I did win the “how many pieces of toilet paper go around mum’s stomach” competition.   Everyone thought I was being overly optimistic in my estimate (i.e. read they all think I look HUGE and I don’t think I’m THAT big); however on checking my 9 and 3/4 pieces was a perfect fit.   See, I know how big we are.  Your smaller Uncle J managed to catch everyone out many times by getting them to say “baby” out aloud using all sorts of clever conversational tricks, and collected a lot of pegs in that peg-collecting game.   And generally there was lots of laughter and running around.   And eating of tasty dips and treats all prepared by your dad (great hommus, babaganoush, tzitizki, garlic nuts, anzac biscuits -that was me, pita crisps, some kinda meat things that of course I didn’t eat)…  Oh, and how could I forget the “spit the dummy” competition.   Not surprisingly, the men seemed to excel at this one.   It was hard to remember not to eat and spit the dummy at the same time.   🙂

your dad practising baby handling with the baby bjorn

your dad practising baby handling with the baby bjorn

Yes, and we got a great shot of your dad practising baby pacification techniques with the new baby bjorn and an astro boy doll.   He walked around with a fake ‘you’ in the sling for hours.   Not sure I’m with the ‘wine for baby’ method of settling, but we’ll see.  Open to ideas at this stage.

After baby shower action I was totally tired tired tired.   I seem to be that way at the moment.  You are waking at odd hours during the night, I’m waking myself with very strong reflux, and generally its pretty hard to get comfortable with a watermelon attached to your torso.   And the dreams are full-on.  Stressful and all-engaging.  I can’t seem to wake myself from them enough to realise its not real so I lie there for hours not sleeping thinking weird things are going to happen for sure.  Like I’m going to have to have to have a cook-off competition – muffins against some crazy person –  in order to be able to make sure I get all your clothes washed in time for your arrival.   Obviously important issues that my brain is turning over, translating into perfectly logical scenarios in my dreams.  Not.   At least I’m not dreaming you’re an alien or whatever.

So, the ‘getting things in order’ aka ‘Nesting’ bug has set-in.    Its pervading my dreams and my subconsious.   I’ve made it clear to your dad that we need the baby room ready.  We went through all the clothes and things we already had on Saturday night, and made a shopping list.   By listing all the lovely things people had already given us (lots) and working out what we still needed.   Mostly it consisted of mini-grow-suits and nappy buckets and the like.   So we  went off to do that on Sunday.   Shop, shop, shop.   Now, I generally hate shopping centres and shopping, but if I say so myself we did it pretty well,  a few major stops and we stocked-up on size 0000 grow-suits, singlets, a few pairs of socks, nappies (only found flannel soft ones), nappy buckets, a soft thing to put on the change table for you to lie on, vitamins, leaky boob pads, a thermometer for your ear.

So for day one, you’ll have:

  • four (4) – 0000 growsuits with feet
  • 3 long-sleeved 0000 tops
  • 2 -0000 long-pants
  • some socks (not sure how many you need.  We’ll send your dad out for more where necessary)
  • singlets
  • some little short-sleeved suits.  Though its a bit cold for that
  • blankets to be swaddled in
  • two caps/hats for your head to be warm
  • lots of nappies

All necessary baby things.  You got mostly white stuff and some bits of blue and pink.  There really are limited choices.   I’m not sure why its so boring, but there you go.  Stifle them from a young age maybe?   You missed out on new cot sheets as I refuse to pay more for a set of sheets for a 1m baby cot than I would on sheets for our full-sized queen bed.   Thankfully your Aunt R bought some of your cousins old ones over yesterday, so now you have something to sleep on.

On the shopping front – still to go is a baby monitor, and perhaps a breast-pump.   I don’t know how you possibly make a decision about which one of these items to buy – there are lots to choose from, they’re expensive and do you really need polyphonic rhymes on your boobs??  We were looking at these items in a baby shop towards the end of my shopping-attention-span.   I’m obviously confused.  The polyphonic bits were on the baby monitors.   As was the ability to play a CD through them wirelessly.   That is better than our house stereo.   Sorry baby, but that sounds a bit over the top to me.     Anyway, we ended up buying neither of these items – I think I’ll send you dad out when you arrive if either of them prove to be dire necessities.

Your dad has also been doing lots of things to get your room ready.  The cot is now all re-finished and ready to go!

your finished cot

your finished cot

And you?  Well, you’ve been moving around down in there quite a lot.   You and I went to the friendly obstetricians yesterday for our now fortnightly check-up.   All is good.  I peed in the jar, I managed to miss my hand (wooh! that is a good achievement when its hard to see past your belly to what you are doing down there with a little bottle), I’ve got a bit fatter, your heartbeat is dead-on average, my blood pressure is same as always (low).   Best of all, just as your dad and I thought, you have been making your way slowly down down down.   Your head isn’t ‘engaged’ yet, but its certainly lower than it was two weeks ago.  Now I can feel your head bulge right above my pubis bone.  And you kick me less in the ribs than before as you’ve moved down slightly.   So the obstetrician said all of that was a good sign – the moving down and the lots of kicking and moving that you do.   After coming home from the obs office, you seemed to have taken what he said to heart.   Yesterday was actually quite painful as it seems you were trying to worm you way into my nether regions, but they just weren’t quite ready for you yet.  Think sharp twinges and me wondering if you were going to come early.   I went for a very short walk after work and I thought that if I broke into a run (nigh impossible) that you might come flying out.   I’m sure you wouldn’t have, I guess I’m just not quite used to the amount of downward pressure that you have started to exert.   My hips and pelvis got pretty stiff and I couldn’t sit in my chair for work either – I’ve gone to the backwards on chair position, and am alternating with the fit-ball.

washing the baby clothes

washing the baby clothes

And finally.  Its stopped raining (though its still a bit overcast).   And since we have a bunch of new clothes for you, and a bunch of recycled blankets, sheets and other assorted items (care of your Grandma K & Aunt R), its time for washing.  So wash wash wash.  I did three loads of nappies and a load of whites for you yesterday.  While they looked very cute they took an age to hang out – lots of pegs!   Hopefully they’ll all dry today and then we’ll be almost ready to pack a bag for hospital.   But before we do that your dad and I are going to lie in them for a bit, maybe when we sleep, so they smell like us.  Lucky you!  Smelly clothes from day one!  Hopefully then you can get used to us and our smell will be familiar and good.

the first line full of nappies - this will become a common sight at our house..

the first line full of nappies – this will become a common sight at our house..

So.  Today.  Work work work and some more blanket and sheet washing.   Only about 10 loads to go!

Hope you’re well.  Sorry about the indigestion last night – you seemed to suffer through it and wake all night too.   We’re not going to eat rich potato gratin anytime near bed again.   I don’t like vomiting at 2 in the morning any more than the next person.

erk.

love you

mum

 

hospitals and surgery (no, for everyone else except you… hopefully we’ll be avoiding the surgery bit when you come, and minimising the hospital bit too. But I’m getting more used to them – hospitals that is.) May 12, 2009

Filed under: exercise,healthcare,pregnancy — rakster @ 4:49 pm
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Hello Little Speckle,

Well, doctors, doctors, doctors.  Have spent the majority of yesterday and some of today around hospitals and doctors.

We (you and I) had a fun (not) morning yesterday in the oncology ward at the hospital, watching all sorts of people get needles and drips and what not.   Lots of waiting, waiting.  I was a bit stressed and then just got used to it.   You were pretty content with it all.   Not the funnest place on the planet to be, but not as bad as I expected it to be.

Then today we went to the specialist for my ankle,  remember I sprained it back when you really were only a little Speck?  Well, as they suspected, the orthopedic surgeon confirmed that my ankle needs surgery to repair it so I can walk, run and use it properly again.  They are going to have to tighten up my ligaments, reattach / move the reticulum around the ankle tendons, and then hopefully my tendons haven’t torn and all they need to do is strengthen them out and carve a deeper groove for them in my bone.  If I’ve torn them all to shreds they are going to have to take some tendon from somewhere else in my leg and then use it to repair the ankle.  Bone-grinding goodness.   Yay.   But as we knew, I have to wait until you’ve popped out before any of this can occur.   And once that happens, I am going to be unable to move around so much for a while, so basically I need to be able to pick a time when I can then afford to be on crutches for six weeks post-op to recover.   Yay yay yay lucky me.   So more fun stuff to look forward to.

Otherwise all is well.  You’re kicking around like normal and I’m feeling like a whale.  You and I are off to Sydney for the rest of the week tomorrow morning.  It should be our last plane trip on the way back, as I’m getting up to the no-fly time for pregnant people.   Its going to be busy, but hopefully we’ll get some time to chill out a bit too – not coming back until Saturday afternoon, so a little bit of hang-out and do non-work-stuff time in there too.  Anything special you feel like doing?  Well, you let me know…

love you

mum

 

Hiccups. Again. Its one of the strangest feelings I’ve ever felt. And Antenatal Classes Mark #5. May 1, 2009

Filed under: baby stuff,baby's feelings,birthing,development stages,healthcare,pregnancy — rakster @ 6:20 pm
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Hello Little Spectacle,

How are things going with you?  All well with me.   You’re awake and down there hiccupping again.  It must be that time of day. Its one of the strangest things I’ve ever felt.  Apparently it could be you practicing breathing by exercising your diaphragm.   You started it last week.  And have continued almost daily since then.  There is a sort of popping kinda feeling down in my uterus.  It almost feels as though there is a membrane in there somewhere going in and out.  A bit like the silver top from an old-fashioned bottle of milk coming off.  Repeatedly.  Inside me.   So, yeah, a bit weird and freaky.   But also, now that I’m used to it, comforting in some strange way.

Antenatal classes continued last night.  Your dad wasn’t keen to go, pramway construction having reached an impasse for the day – a few little niggly mistakes in the pramway causing a bit of back-tracking had put him in a particularly foul mood.   However your craving for potato-gems for dinner (all you, not me at all) I think helped lift his spirits, as did the fact that his planned dentist visit wasn’t as bad as he thought it was going to be.   Thus, belly-full of fried, baked and rolled-in-sour-cream oily potato goodness (with some coleslaw thrown in for good measure), we trundled off to the hospital to meet with our friends the midwife and other pregnoid couples.   Its a bit strange but I’m going to miss it a bit when it finishes, six weeks of jokes and disbelief and panic with other couples really does bring you together slightly.   Its been really odd observing them too, and seeing how they interact as couples, what they are looking forward to, scared of, all those things.  There are a mix of people of different ages and backgrounds, but all are excited and keen and its lovely to see that too.

Last night was Caesarean Sections and Breastfeeding.  Relatively depressing really.  It was all very serious.   Your dad went green watching the Caesarean Section video, while I coped apart from the part when they showed the epidural going in.  The cutting through the stomach tissue & then the breaking of the uterine sack was actually pretty cool.   The uterine sack thing was really white and of course all the waters started just squirting out everywhere when they put the scalpel through it slightly.   Watching a white and purple head emerge from a big cut was a bit surreal.  That really freaked your dad out while I thought that bit was kinda cool.   The little baby they pulled out was very purple but quickly started to breathe and got some colour.   And cried.  It wasn’t very happy!

I don’t really want a caesarean, I guess no-one really does want any surgery if they don’t have to have it.  I think I’d find it really weird being awake through it – and it takes so long and there are so many people in the room.   I think to some extent I’d rather be able to see it than just see a big blue sheet with lots of doctors and nurses and midwives moving around behind it.  Another thing that you really don’t know how you’d cope with until it happens.

Breastfeeding is a bit the same.  Yep, they are pretty pro-breastfeeding at the hospital, which is good, but really, how much can you learn in an antenatal class???  I found it a bit ho-hum, as I’ve read a bit about it before and generally think its one of those things that is going to be hard to take in until you try it yourself.   Chatting with your dad on the way home though, he said he found it really informative and useful.  So we got something out of it.  Oh, I guess the bit I got was that if you do use bottles / express or whatever, there is no need for any sterilisation palava as long as you wash it.   Your milk, your baby, your bottles and knick-knacks, no sterilisation required.  Awesome.  That helps.

Today I took a lunch break and went down to West End and had a massage.  My back has been pretty sore and sitting at my desk all day tap-tap-tapping doesn’t help.   It was lovely.   I lay there for 15 minutes afterwards and relaxed, then gave you a massage of your own, as you’d woken up.   You seemed to enjoy your massage too and went back to sleep.   Its my way of getting you used to my touch before you come out.

Pramway - Our front yard before commencement of construction

Pramway – Our front yard before commencement of construction

Your dad is still out the front pramway-building.  I’m going to finish off in here and then head off to yoga.

Pramway is underway. Nearly ready for the decking!

Pramway is underway. Nearly ready for the decking!

love you.

mum

under construction - getting those joists in was a lot of work. Hopefully it will hold the weight of people walking up and down it for years.

under construction – getting those joists in was a lot of work. Hopefully it will hold the weight of people walking up and down it for years.

 

Antenatal Classes Mark #4. And you uncle is staying with us. April 25, 2009

Filed under: birthing,development stages,eating,healthcare,pregnancy — rakster @ 2:12 pm
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Hello Little Spectacular,

how are you today?  Going well down there?  All is well out here.   I was feeling a little off yesterday and had a few doctor’s appointments, so took the day off work.  Subsequently today, a Saturday, feels like Sunday and I’m already all relaxed and happy.  I like three day weekends.   I’ve been out to the markets and bought some fresh strawberries, limes for coconut and lime ice cream, beetroot and lots of other goodies.

This week has been busy.  Your uncle has been staying, so our house has been busier / noisier than normal, in a good way.  Its strange getting used to someone different being in the house with your dad and I.  We are really very set in our ways.  I think its a good preparation for you coming – we’ve had to be more flexible and not do things exactly the same way.   I know you’ll create much more havoc than him, but getting used to it has been a start.  At least I think so.

Antenatal classes this week were about your birth and how to manage pain during it.  Basically talking through comfort measures, gas, pethidine and epidurals.    Again, a broad mix of people in the room makes for an interesting class.   Some women sound like they want the epidural straight away – “why even bother with trying and going through the pain for hours when you know you will want to end up with an epidural anyway?” was a legitimate question (fyi: answer from midwife was along the lines of apart from any personal sense of achievement / desire to labour naturally, doing it upright and moving about will potentially reduce the time of the labour and make it less likely for further intervention).   I find it a bit weird, I guess I know the pain relief options, so didn’t learn too much from that, but putting it in context of the labour and when most people use them etc was good.   Sounds like the ethos of the birthing centre at the Royal Women’s hospital would have been more our kinda ‘thing’, but I’m sure we’ll be ok at the Mater Private too.   I like our obstetrician and I think he’ll respect our choices.   I think your dad and I will write a simple birth plan that will be a guide if all goes 100% to plan, with the idea that we’ll just have to chuck it out and do whatever works best (naturally or medically) at the time.  Who knows.  Maybe you’ll be well behaved and your neural pathways will just guide you to be a perfect little descending head, facing the right way, getting your cord out of the way, and not getting too stressed about the whole thing.  On the other hand, maybe you’ll freak out, or my body will freak out, and we just have to get you pulled out as quick as can be.   Whatever way, your dad and I are looking forward to meeting you more and more every day.

The other weird part of the class was seeing the little suction-cap that they can use to assist pulling you out.   My goodness, its quite small, the suction cup about half the size of the palm of my hand.  But very strong suction.  You could use it as a pretty good drunk & sleeping trick on someone & give them a hickie-like bruise in a perfect 6cm diameter.  Party trick.   No wonder babies get even more misshapen little heads when they get pulled out that way.   Ow.

The class finished with a lovely video about babies and ‘dad time’.  It was about gazing and how important this will be for you to develop your neural connections, and how your dad can start to bond with you from day one by helping you practice.   And that your dad can settle you too – its not all about the boob.    A mushy, gooey video that made me and your dad feel excited and look forward to you coming.    It was interesting that in the video it talked about babies recognising their dad’s voices almost immediately, even in the hour after you are born.  Apparently your dad’s voice may be able to cut through all the background noise, whatever is happening, and you’ll focus on it.  I already think I’ve told you that I think you react to your dad’s voice even now – kicking and moving around and playing when we are talking, or he is talking to you.   So I hope you’ll recognise him straight away when you come out too.

Yesterday was another obstetrician visit.  Our doctor was away – apparently he’d had a busy week – so his fill-in was there.  He is a funny, old man who is very friendly and relaxed.  His comment when he saw me was that I’d “got bigger than last time I saw you”.   Funny that.  Anyway, all is good with you, as we knew, you’re head down, bum up, with your legs and arms coming over to the left hand side of my body, which is why I feel you kicking and moving around there.   He made your dad feel your head through my stomach – which was funny as your dad didn’t really want to, having done so already before going to the doctors, but with some encouragement (ie insistence on the doctor’s part) he did.   We were talking about it on the way home and decided that maybe some people don’t push on their tummies to work out where their babies are – and even less-so the man doing this to the woman.  We do it all the time.  But then recalled a conversation I had with other women at the antenatal classes, about where the baby was sitting, and apart from the ones whose obstetricians had told them, most didn’t know.  Which I thought was a bit weird, as I know where you are.  But maybe they don’t push around and feel with their hands?  I do.  I give you massages every day, and generally have a talk to you while I do it.  I wait until you’re awake and having a play mostly.   Other news from the obstetrician – I’ve remained the same weight since my last visit (see, some women do put on a lot at the beginning and then flatten out over time), my blood pressure is the same and good, and your heart is still beating away.   All A-ok.   Good growing.

Going to run and eat cheese, bread and figs for lunch.  To nourish you, of course.

love you

fig and cheese for lunch

fig and cheese for lunch

mum

 

 

week 30! omg 10 weeks to go. And Antenatal classes Mark #3. April 17, 2009

Filed under: birthing,healthcare,pregnancy — rakster @ 11:07 am
Tags: , , , , , , , , ,

Hello Speck,

Its finally stopped raining for two days straight! Things inside the house are starting to feel like they are slowing drying out, but things like blankets still need an airing after the previous two weeks of torrential downpour. Apparently it is going to be the wettest April in 20 years. Twenty years ago I had just started high school and was alternately catching the train to school and trying to avoid puddles, and being taken down to the park before school by your Grandad M to fill big white buckets with as many Graceville Green Frog eggs as we could before the water levels of the flooded park went down again and they all died as little tadpoles.

So. You are due in 10 weeks. Well, 9 weeks and six days now, to be precise, or 69 days. Your dad and I walked up to the hospital last night for our third antenatal class. This one was with the physio again, and was about pain management and pain cycles, and birthing positions. We got to practice some and best of all we gave each other reciprocal massages. It was pretty good. Interestingly, we went around the room at one point and some of the men and some of the women had to say what they were most worried about. The men were all worried about knowing what to do on the day, what to do if something went wrong, and how to be the best support. The women unanimously said that they had been consciously putting-off thinking about or dealing with the birth itself too much. Which is exactly what I have been doing. Good-oh. Spot-on average. I do think though that the pregnancy hormones have something to do with this – its impossible to get too worried about anything for any length of time, the hormones kick in and I just feel like it will all work out somehow.

You were very quiet through the whole thing, but then on the walk home I was in quite a bit of pain again, I think it was those Braxton Hicks contractions again – my stomach just gets really really tight all over and a bit of back pain, and discomfort. It comes and goes. It abated after about 20 minutes. When we then went to bed you were the most active you’ve been in days. Lots of kicking, moving and pushing again.

Know that your dad and I are both thinking about you and feeling you down there.

love mum.