Btw – it’s been raining a lot… And the frogs in the garden are laying more eggs. Your dad and uncle Jake were fishing for tadpoles in the garden today..
grumpy April 2, 2009
I’m grumpy again. Not sure about these pregnancy hormones. They are good sometimes but gee, when I’m grumpy I’m really grumpy.
Watch out. Better not kick me in the ribs too much today. You never know what might happen.
dreaming of your birth April 1, 2009
Dear Speck,
good morning little squirmy one. You are moving around whenever I sit or lie still. Its been going for days. Given that I work sitting still, and sleep lying down, that is a lot of squirming. Its quite disconcerting to lie down and watch you make my stomach go into strange shapes. You can make it ripple, make a lump in it as you push up & stay pushing up, and make it just jiggle a lot. Good work.
Had a strange dream about you last night. I was reading about birthing before bed, so no surprises as to where the thought process came from. The dream was about you being born. Good for me, you came out really quickly, and it wasn’t too painful – I actually remember saying to your dad, “well, that wasn’t too bad, must have been really lucky”. Anyway, you were gorgeous except you had a very funny shaped little nose. Your eyes looked at me and I loved you a lot straight away and just didn’t want to put you down. You were pretty clean too compared to the mucous and blood-covered babies I’ve seen born before. You were also amazingly well-developed for a newborn as next thing in the dream you were trying to pull your own head up and I was trying to make sure I didn’t drop you as you squirmed around.
I think I have a phobia about dropping you when you come out.
And you were a girl, though I don’t remember seeing any genitalia, just knowing that you were a girl. You had a big head too. But it is your eyes that I remember most clearly. Bit spooky.
This week overall you’re suddenly feeling a lot more real to me. Might be all the moving around. I’ve started calling you baby, and now I really think of you as a little person more and more. Wheras before you were a bit more ephemeral in my mind somehow… Now you’re solid and you move me around when you want, and you seem to get cranky when I lie on the side you’re resting on, and you seem to respond to your Dad’s voice when he talks to you (or me) by moving around. And if you were born early you might survive in a humidicrib. Much more than just a speck.
anyway, hope you enjoy the exercise down there.
love you
mum
its your dad’s birthday and we ate a lot of icecream cake… despite the fact the endocrinologist says I’ve gone too hard on the weight gain front. March 29, 2009
Hello Speck!
Its your dad’s birthday today, so it was a big day with lots of friends and family and a HUGE icecream cake. Neopolitan flavour – all hand-made by me, you and Lukey, who came over to help with it yesterday (well, really I think he thought that making icecream would involve lots of opportunity for little kids to lick the bowl and he’s be on a winner). So, it was chocolate, vanilla and strawberry. Rich chocolate, vanilla bean and fresh strawberry. I think the whole thing was about eight litres of icecream – so a big one. I started with vanilla making on Friday night, and made the vanilla custard. Then yesterday Luke and I made the chocolate custard and I started up the new ice cream maker. Chocolate first. Made a big layer with lots of belgian cocoa and lindt chocolate. Very rich. The only container I decided would hold enough for the hordes of people coming was the largest salad spinner we have. The zyliss put to a new use. After chocolate it was time to freeze the vanilla. Did that. Then I made lemon sorbet for the non-dairy people.
Then a break for the AFL football. Your dad wanted to see a game for his birthday, so we walked down to the Gabba and watched the lions beat the eagles in a game that was quite good to watch, with your two uncles, grandad & R. then walked home. Got home and decided that even though it was late the cake really needed to set overnight, so despite my earlier plan to do the final layer in the morning, got to it with a kilo of fresh strawberries. Ice cream maker on overdrive until one am, when I put the final layer on the cake, and popped it all back in the freezer to set overnight. So, icecream cake + lemon sorbet ready to go and frozen. A bit less sleep than normal.
Today I just ate one bit though. It was a hit with everyone – lots of sounds of spoon sucking. Some people liked the strawberry, and some the chocolate. The vanilla was a bit lost in the middle, but I think the cake wouldn’t have been the same without it. I know you wanted more, but I just ate the one bit. Along with the rocket and cheese muffins I made (from the rocket your dad grew), we had enough… Despite the fact that I know I get ice cream cravings because of you (my usual preference is sorbet). It was rich, but its also because of the endocrinologist who did her best to make me feel like I should give up icecream… Bad timing as the new icecream maker just arrived (it is my new baby before you arrive).
We went to the endocrinologist on Friday, and she says I’ve put on far too much weight. I’ve gone up 14 kg already. Apparently that is too much. But I feel fine, and I still exercise a lot. So it can’t be all bad. Anyway, she saw me briefly, asked some questions, wrote a list of more blood tests and other things I have to go and get jabbed for in the coming weeks (fun fun fun) and then charged me a lot of money for the privilege. Finished by telling me icecream should be cut out of the diet as it will be more comfortable for me if I don’t put on any more weight.
I’ve been thinking about it. I still don’t get it. How do they decide how much you should put on? I think you’re an average size baby, and I’m an average healthy sized woman, so I guess I would fall into the ‘you’d expect to put on x kg’ bracket. But without asking further questions and testing, how does a doctor know you’ve put on too much weight? For example, apparently most people put on lots of weight at the end of their pregnancies, and not so much at the beginning. And maybe I will put on a lot from now too. But I put on a lot at the beginning. And I was still exercising a lot. My boobs are large normally, and they have grown exponentially and are a lot heavier than before. That has happened about three times now. Most people apparently only need to buy a new set of bras once. I’m on my third set. Each time, I bought big ones, but the boobs are just getting bigger and bigger. I’ve discussed this seriously with your dad, and we both agree that my boobs have got to have at least 5kg extra weight between them alone. I actually think I put on nearly 10kg mostly in the first trimester, and in the second I’ve just put on a bit of weight more slowly. So what is to say that is wrong for me? Its not like I eat badly.
Overall the last few days have been a bit up and down. I hope you haven’t been too disrupted by my abrupt mood swings and general discombobulation. Yesterday I spent the day alternately making ice cream and then feeling upset. It is going to continue for a while, so you may have to get used to it. I think you are enjoying having your dad around – you move a lot when its just he and I having a quiet chat, like you know his voice and find it something you should react to.
Love you, we might get a bit more ice cream in before sleep time, if you’re good.
mum
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